Episode 125 The Diary of an Emotional Eater: The Dark Side

Episode 125 The Diary of an Emotional Eater: The Dark Side

Hey, how are you? It’s Tammy Marshall, I’m The UnEmotional Eater.

I am in training. I've been training for the last four days. It's oh my gosh! I love my trainer, but she wears my brain out sometimes. Anyway, we were talking yesterday, I had to do this whole exercise and because she always is checking our work; making sure that we're doing what we're supposed to be doing so that we serve you well.

We were talking about what we call the dark shadow, the dark side of ourselves and you know it's that stuff that we try to hide. That stuff we don't want people to know; that could be that bitchy part of you, that could be that judgmental part of you, that could be that irritable part of you. We're in the south, we're supposed to be southern and sweet, but maybe there's this part of you that just wants to tear somebody's head off. Did I say that out loud?

There are these parts, we call parts of us, that we try to hide, we try to overpower. If I just put enough happy on them or have affirming thoughts, that somehow, they're going to go away. The truth is, they're not. They need a little bit of help and the fact that they don't have to drive us. Because as an emotional eater, when I feel those things come up out of me, then that's the stuff like food has become had become my drug of choice. When you feel those things in your body or in your emotions that you don't want to feel, then food is the habit. It is that place that I had gone for so many years, just to numb it out; because I didn't want to feel it, I didn't want other people to see it. That's the thing that we do.

Often if you're an emotional eater, you're just focused on the weight. It's that idea that if I just go on a new diet then I'll solve this. But the reality is, until I get those emotions in balance, then I'm not going to be able to even stick to the diet. Which becomes a whole shame, guilt, remorse, thing that happens as well. Which just anchors down this whole idea that, “I can't get it, I'm never going to get it, it's never going to be right, I'm always going to be like this” but please tell me I'm the only one that goes down that whole rabbit hole of self-deprecation.

That's my trainer’s dogs, Willa and Huxley. Hold on, I’ll flip this around, so you can see them up there on the porch. They're absolutely beautiful dogs. Obviously, Willa is not very happy right now about one of our friends being in the field behind me. My trainer has this gorgeous view I don't know if you can see it, of the Smokies.

I just want to kind of bring out this what we call the shadow side, the dark side of our soul, because we all have it. I don't even know that you could do enough work to actually completely get it rid of it, but at least you can do the work that you need in order to feel more in balance with it, to where it's not like rearing its head against you all the time.

This is about feeling more comfortable in your body, appreciating all the sides of yourself. No longer feeling the need hide out from yourself or from others. No longer needing to go into food in order to numb out those feelings, those thoughts, those beliefs about yourself.

I've been talking about the class coming up. I have this other trip that just came up, so it's going to be moved to the first week in August. If you want to talk to me about it, just private message me and we can talk about it.

I always just want to leave you with the idea that there's hope; you don't always - this isn't how it has to be forever. You can absolutely feel freedom from food, so that you can eat what you what you want to eat and actually weigh what you want a weigh. That you're no longer all hung up with all that stuff, but if you're an emotional eater it is about balance with your emotion and having a means in order to do that. Because, that didn't just naturally happen, I had to find processes in order to have a means of doing that.

Anyway, always, go have a blessed day. Go love on others, love you and let’s put the good in today. I try to avoid the news, because there's not much good going on there, but look in the world for the good that is going on; because there is good in people, there is good in the world. Also adding your act to kindness. Be blessed, I'll talk to you soon. Blessings.