Episode 136 The Diary of an Emotional Eater: There’s no love in the food
Aug 30, 2019
Hey, how are you? My name is Tammy Marshall, I'm the creator of The UnEmotional Eater Protocol.
I wanted to talk about ‘there's no love in the food’. I think that's one of the biggest things, if you're experiencing cravings, compulsions, binges with certain foods. There is a disconnection or a misappropriation of emotions between you and that food. We always want to go, “Hey we're addicted to the food” but really what it is, is we're addicted to the feeling in what we believe.
I've told the story before about the woman that had to have those pretzels that have peanut butter in them, every day. She weighed and measured them, because she'd had had stomach surgery; gastric bypass or sleeve or whatever. It wasn't that she was just eating them out of control, it was just that she had to have them every day. That was the food that we chose to work on and as we started working, I always asked my question, “Who did you eat this with? She said, “I didn't eat peanut butter with anybody” but as we started working, it's almost like this covering comes off the memory, because the covering - that sounds a little woo-woo but it is - there's a covering over it and it's a protection. It believes it's protecting you and keeping you safe, when in fact it's actually harming you. As we started working, she was like, “Holy buckets! I would eat peanut butter and saltine crackers with my parents, watching TV every evening.” So, it was love, she wanted love, she wanted that connectivity to her parents. So, we created that space and the peanut butter was gone. I think I just told the story again recently. Literally, she could not smell a fresh jar of peanut butter. We, me and the other lady that were in the room, when she opened the fresh jar of peanut butter to smell it, because I always test my work, we could smell it, but she couldn’t, and she was on top of it. That's how gone it was out of her system.
I lead groups, where I teach people how to take their authority back from food. How to create an identity of someone who's healthy, strong; somebody who can get joy out of life and not be battling food. Last night we were working on butter and brown sugar. Did any of you all eat butter and sugar sandwiches? I did.
Again, the same thing happened, this woman had no idea but what bubbled up to the surface was love with her mother. I can guarantee you, if you're having a problem with a food, it is a love issue and the love is in the wrong place. I know when I say that, a lot of folks absolutely can't see it, because you have blinders on for it, but that's what doing the work does. The work takes the blinders off. The second it starts to see the light of day, the truth rises and the power goes out of the food. You just aren't drawn and energized by it anymore. It really is the craziest thing ever; if you've had a food, that something that you had to have and all of a sudden you just go, ‘I don't care” it's amazing.
To experience that kind of freedom, and you realize that it's not your fault. So often, when we're dealing with food and weight issues, we think it's some moral issue, like we're morally inept or we're bad people or whatever. But it's because there's this whole virus like thing in our programming that we keep trying to fix this thing, when it didn't have anything to do with that thing. It's this other thing, you have to get the virus out of the programming before anything else is going to shift. Gosh I hope that makes sense. I know personally, how hard I struggled trying to control my appetite, control cravings and control my behavior; control, control, control, and it's truly like trying to hold a beach ball under water. You can do that for so long, but your muscles are going to tire and at some point, that thing is going shooting straight up in the sky. Then you have to put forth all that effort to get it back under the water again.
So, you're not doing it wrong, you're not a bad person, this isn't a moral issue, it's not because you don't have any willpower; that's all crap sold to us by the diet industry. It truly is like there's a virus in your programming and it really is about changing the programming.
I have another class coming up if you want to talk about it, just to see if it's a good fit for where you are. Please just private message me and I'll give you a link and we can talk. It is so powerful to be able to give people the tools in order for them to fix their appetite, fix their relationship with food, fix the relationship with their selves. When those emotions are in our system and they're having a free-for-all and we haven't learned how to manage them. It's pretty amazing to have a set path on what to do, so that you feel in balance in your brain and in your body.
Go love on somebody today, I always tell you all that. It’s a big crazy world out there and people just need to know there is a love, kindness and goodness still left in the world. Go be that light. I always tell you to go be that light for you first. I can't tell you; I could only love other people to the capacity that I loved myself and when I really started digging in and doing this work, I realized that actually I didn't like myself at all. There were parts of me that I actually hated and so being able to integrate and love those parts of me as well, because there's good and bad in all of us. What I found is the more that I loved me, the more I loved others.
So, anyway, go love on you, go love on others. Just an act of kindness; open the door, smile, say thank you, put somebody's cart back, buy somebody's coffee, just do something nice for somebody and go have a blessed day.
See ya, and be sure and watch college football tomorrow. See ya!
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